Sometimes… you just gotta laugh

Life has been a little surreal around here of late.

I’m adapting to many things, crutches in particular, although sometimes I forget all about them and jump up, only to then gaze fearfully around, as though I’m trapped in sinking sand, unable to take a step to retrieve them. I usually end up lunging wildly towards them, which sends shooting pains up and down my leg.

A nurse recently removed my staples, all twenty of them. I remained standing for the procedure. She asked me why my leg was trembling….because it tickled like crazy! It was a truly terrible ordeal!

She was laughing at the skeletons in the stocks and took a picture of them.

How late was I, she asked, I’ve never lost patients like that before.

There have been several firsts.

I wanted to see  if I could walk without crutches so took a few tentative, unsupported steps. To my huge relief, my leg didn’t drop off!

While sitting in the back garden, an enormous apple fell on my head, almost knocking me out. Cor blimey, it didn’t half hurt!

I finally summoned the courage to get in the car with hubs again.

When leaving hospital, getting into the car turned out to be rather traumatic. I’d been told that my knee must never to be higher than my hip, so a cushion was required for the car, to raise the height of the seat. Hubs turned up with an extremely thick cushion that I simply couldn’t climb up on, so, I ended up sitting across the back seats with my legs up. Hubs then rested the extremely thick cushion against the door for me to lean on.

He then went off to retrieve my handbag, and opened the door my back was resting against, to hand it to me. My head and upper torso immediately fell out of the car, and of course the dodgy leg shot up in the air!!! You should have heard the screams, they’d have turned a siren to dust. The nurse who had just helped me to the car was horrified. I swear she turned a whiter shade of pale.

Poor hubs, he just bundled me back in, and hoped for the best.

Happily, my next car journey was without mishap. Hubs however, managed to smash his very expensive wing mirror while reversing out of a drive. He wasn’t impressed….at all. His day, however, was only going to get worse.

Still fuming, he arrived home, only to find that Annie had been sick, absolutely everywhere. Oh my……the smell.

Hubs was borderline hysterical, never in his born days has he ever had to clean up vomit.

Annie, of course, didn’t just vomit once, she spent the entire day and most of the evening being sick. OH…..I simply can’t describe hubs’ pain, he hollered, vomited, swore and eventually made the most awful dry retching sounds. I think he may even have cried a little.

Being unable to assist him as I’m not allowed to kneel, I decided to take myself  elsewhere, where the air was fresher, so to speak, and I laughed until I cried.

Last Friday I went out! Not just for a drive around the block….but out for an Italian meal. What JOY!!!! I took my cushion, of course, so the dratted knee wouldn’t be higher than the hip, and arranged it on my chair. The manager must have noticed my restless fidgeting and approached our table. He said….

Would you care to try one of my special chairs that I keep upstairs for my older customers?

Of course I would! The poor guy had to cart that chair down a thousand steps, but….wow, it was the right height, had arm rests and was far more comfortable. Bless his older customers! Next time I go there I’ll have to book the table and the chair.

And Finally….

Another first, the dogs lined up in order of height.

LET’S KEEP IN TOUCH!

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42 Comments

  1. Hahahaha….POOR JOHN indeedy!!! I think Annie had been licking old tins in the recycling bag, she has been good as gold since, John is MOST grateful for that. What a day it was!
    How awful hearing of Roomie’s dad’s fall, he has my sympathy, getting in and out of the car in the early days is nerve wracking. Here’s to him making a full recovery. Thanks Anne, I shall read your comment out to John, he will be pleased with the empathy!xxx

  2. Poor POOR John! What a day — I hope he has since recovered from the trauma (and the drama!). It’s been similar with roomie’s dad. Coming and going to the doctor has been trickiest and he’s fallen once — right on the knee that he was using to get around on the scooter.

    Did you ever discover what made Annie so sick? This is important so that Poor John won’t have to have an encore of that wretched experience! POOR JOHN!

  3. How I wish you could have been a fly on the wall watching hubs! It was utterly hysterically funny. He fell apart and lost the plot completely. Happily, my hip survived the fall from the car, I am walking better each day too, so I’m beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Still hoping you get back to blogging soon….miss you!xxxx

  4. I really did laugh out loud reading that – what a hoot! Particularly hubs and the awful dry retching noises………. hahahahahaaa…. All wonderfully hilarious and slapstick…… I am worried about your hip though with the great whooshing tipping up business when hubs opened the door and you half fell out etc….
    Dearie me…. bless you Dina……. hope the hip settles down and you are running around no problem again….

    The nurse and the skeleton remark was fab! hahahaaaxxxx

  5. Oh my goodness what a catalogue of disasters. It’s a good thing you have a sense of humour. Did you shout ‘Eureka!’ when you rediscovered gravity?
    How long will be you on crutches and needing old ladies’ chairs in restaurants?
    I love your line of dogs. Take care and get better soon.

    • I didn’t shout eureka, sadly something far worse!!! That dratted apple hurt!!! I go back to the surgeon on Nov 3rd and I’m hoping I can lose the crutches and the old ladies chair after that, some say you have to have a raised seat for three months, that would drive me crackers! Thanks Chloris.xxx

  6. I don’t know where the time is going! It’s been a week since you’ve posted this, and had I known how amusing it was going to be (apologies to Hubs for my peals of laughter!) I would have been here far sooner. Clearly, you’re making good progress, despite the little glitches here and there — like being tossed out of your own car and being bonked on the head by an apple! Gravity’s a very good thing — except when it isn’t!

    That last photo of the dogs lined up at the door is hilarious, too. But there are other treats here, like that wonderful patio with the leaves nicely arranged over the new pavers, and the wonderfully complex collection of plants. The nice thing about plants is that, even when unattended, they often survive and sometimes thrive — who knows what joys will await you through the winter and into spring?

    • Poor hubs!!! He is trying his best but cleaning vomit is not his forte. You do have to laugh at times, life can be daunting, but also funny. Tell you what, that apple really hurt! It was also unexpected! We are getting some rain so hopefully the plants will survive without me watering them, most are going over now. Thanks Linda, glad you had a laugh.xxx

  7. That last picture is hilarious. Othewise … so many misadventures! Sounds like you are getting better though, so that’s good. Funny about the apple, could it have been thrown by the apple tree, as in the wizard of Oz?

  8. lowcarbdiabeticJan

    Once again you had me laughing (and crying) as I read your post …
    I think it can only help if we are able to laugh whenever misfortunes come our way. Sometimes it’s not easy … but I’m sure it helps.

    I think your garden is looking very nice.
    I hope you continue to improve as each day passes.

    Thinking of you and sending my good wishes

    All the best Jan

    PS Love the photo of the dogs!

    • Good to have you laughing Jan, sometimes you just have to laugh! Life just keeps ongoing after all. I loved that pic, these three rarely do photogenic. Thanks Jan.xxx

  9. Sorry to read about your dramas getting home & adjusting to crutches … & your cute dogs probably feel their world has been turned upside down too. I love the last photo of them & they do look puzzled! So good to hear the story of you getting the “elderly” chair in the Italian restaurant … what ever works! Best wishes & I hope you feel better every day.. 😀👌💕

    • There has certainly been plenty of drama around here, I suppose it’s the same for anyone adjusting to life after surgery. Getting that chair was fantastic! I got a similar one in the hairdressers yesterday, who knew the world was full of special chairs! Thanks Gerrie.xxx

  10. Oh dear, your recovery is proving to be eventful, but I’m glad that day-by-day you’re getting more mobile. It must be frustrating at times. Your Hubs is doing a grand job of being there for you, bless him. Sorry to hear about the damaged wing mirror and the cleaning up episode. As usual you tell it all with humour. Keep smiling. I hope the healing process continues smoothly and there’ll be more nice meals out. The Italian restaurant manager was molto gentile.

    • It is a relief to gradually become more mobile, you quickly forget the early days. Hubs has been great, he has suddenly acquired a lot of extra duties. You have to keep smiling, there is always something to enjoy and be grateful for. I have been back to the Italian restaurant…what joy!!! Fab food too.xxx

  11. You have surgery and hubs loses his mind because he has to clean up vomit? Looks like the karma fairy came by and gave a him a bit of perspective. Happy healing!

  12. Sometimes it’s good to have surreal periods of life. It makes you savor a bit of normalcy. And who knew that your operation would give you a pass on vomit duty. I love the photo of your doggies lined up at the door. I’m sure they are puzzled by your crutches and hobbling about.
    Try to enjoy what you can of your recovery–even if it’s just the odd laugh and a new appreciation of being able to walk. Here’s hoping that you are you running about soon.

    • How true, I shall certainly appreciate a little normalcy after all this. Good point re avoiding vomit duty too, that has to be a bonus. The dogs did seem perturbed by the crutches but seem to have accepted them now. I shall certainly take your advice and try to enjoy certain aspects of recovery, oh….the thought of walking pain free is a good one. Thanks Brenda.xxx

  13. Oh, Dina, I’ve been wondering how you’re doing; think of you every morning. Hope you’re sleeping well.

    Hope your husband is recovering from his “adventures,” too! Yikes, poor Annie, but even more sympathy for your husband, since it looks like Annie’s recovered. (I DO Love the photo of Sam-Annie-Buddy. Just perfect!)

    How great you’ve been trying to walk and managed a restaurant visit. That’s just wonderful to hear!

    The car adventure made me cringe, imagining the pain. Ouch galore. Lots of adapting when we’re healing from these things, isn’t there?! The first time’s the hardest, as you found out, poor dear. I bet you’re swinging in and out like a gymnast, now. 🙂

    The gardens look so beautiful: what a paradise. It’s so elegant and inviting, Dina!

    Thank you for a fabulous post: made me laugh (and cringe!).

    Love to you, and continued healing…peacefully.

    • How lovely that you think of me each morning! The nights are by far worse than the days. I struggle with lying on my back and wack up after a few hours as the leg stiffens and goes numb. I’m sure it was the same for you. Some nights are getting better though, I’m hoping for more of them.
      Oh….I still cringe when I remember that first car journey. I also felt a little panicky re how I was going to get out as getting in was bad enough….It’s a good job things get better isn’t it? It does make you respect and admire people with disabilities that much more. Thanks Kitty, love to you always.xxxx

  14. What a tale you have to tell! It had me chuckling and grimacing in equal measure. So pleased that you’re on the mend – I hope that Annie’s okay too! Love that last photo, one to treasure. xx

    • Thanks Caro, I’ve done a fair share of chuckling and grimacing myself!! It is great to be on the mend. Annie is fine, she must have eaten something that disagreed with her. I love that last photo too.xxx

  15. Good heaven, Dina… I can’t imagine someone cleaning up vomit… That’s one thing could make me sick for days, so I can imagine how John felt.
    I guess you need to “exercise patience” in order to heal well and fast. Is going to be hard enough to see the garden and all the works which have to be done before winter, but don’t let yourself be tempted of taking the chance by trying to bend down…
    I love all these colors of the Autumn when the leaves give us such great emotions, you get almost forced to take pictures or start drawing.
    Hugs to all of you :-)claudine & Co.

    • I loathe cleaning up vomit too so was more than happy to let hubs deal with it. I have had to accept that I won’t be able to do any gardening until next year, at least the weeds will die down over winter. I will have plenty of time to plan a beautiful garden! Autumn is such a beautiful, atmospheric season, my favourite I think. Love to you all.xxx

  16. Hang on! I’ve lost track here; Annie, she’s the small one isn’t she? What made her sick?
    Who is the middle one? A senior moment arises, I’ve forgotten the name of the tall one….don’t tell me she’s Annie….is she. Splendiferous pic.

    Your garden re-arrangements looks superb. Poor you being divested of your clips by someone who thinks she’s a spectre!! I’m puzzled the action tickled. Maybe that’s what a spectre does . Although, in reality, I think it depends where on ones figure one is clipped (as in metal ones).

    Your description of your progress to independent mobility is very human and hilarious. You could write a ‘carry-on’ style book about it . Thumbs up and multiple star ratings for your hubs and the maestro Italiano. Sounds like you are pottering around awfully well.

    Onward and upward. xxxx

    • I’m laughing at your senior moment, I have far too many of those. Sam id the large black dog, Annie the middle one and Buddy the little Jack/staffy cross.
      I was surprised when the staple removing tickled, it was odd. Maybe it was little nerves under the skin prickling. Life has been one endless carry-on since I came home, I now have a deep respect for anyone with a disability, you do get creative though. I am pleased with my improved pottering. Thanks Menhir.xxx

  17. All the images are fabulous and the last one of the three angels is priceless 🙂 Your garden looks sensational…..and now to you my dear friend. Sounds like you are handling this situation with your usual aplomb……what an incredible gal you are. Also think what Hubs is learning….just how much you really do, including cleaning up vomit …..!

    Love the story about the skeletons and nurses’s comment. – very funny. OK, hang in there…this too shall pass. and one of these days you will be laughing about all of this….properly. Sending love and wishes for a speedy recovery….Janet xxxx

    • Thanks Janet, the dogs do look cute in that last pic. I suppose we have to just get on with things don’t we, yes, this too will pass, each day things get a little easier so I’m not complaining. How true re laughing properly, I’m looking forward to normal life!!! Love to you too.xxx

  18. For some reason, I’ve not received your last few posts, so had to go back to find out about your hip Dina, so glad you are progressing well, but do take care won’t you!
    Your back garden is looking wonderful, do the dogs run about as much as on the grass? Love your last photo!

    • I have the same problem Pauline, sometimes I stop getting notifications of posts, most odd. I think it happens when the site is upgraded. I’m so glad I paved the back, being able to walk out there is marvelous. I can’t wait to plant it up next year. The dogs love running out there too, they have a lot more room now.xxx

  19. Super Post! Making excellent progress…as can be expected from YOU!!!! Hugs! Got to take it easy, Lass! Let the surprises keep rolling! 🤗🤗💕💕

  20. I’m glad you can laugh about your ‘misfortunes’. The garden is looking good too I hope that you are soon fully mobile.

    • Thanks Sue, you have to laugh, otherwise you’d cry. I am moving around better of late. Hope all is going well with Martyn.xxx

  21. Oh, I had to laugh, it always seems to happen to you, doesn’t it? I’ve always left the clearing of sick to Mick apart from the few odd occasions when he hasn’t been around to take care of it and then my reaction has been somewhat like Hubs so I totally sympathise with him. Love that last photo of the dogs.

    • Lucky you having Mick clear up vomit!!! I hate doing it so was quite happy to pass the book to hubs for once. The dogs can look cute when they put their mind to it. Thanks Jo.xxx

  22. This post had me laughing and shuddering in equal measure.
    Good pictures, I especially like the first and last ones. xx

  23. Hilarious! I know I shouldn’t laugh, but the thought of your Isaac Newton moment, falling out of the car and Hubs having to clear the vomit had me howling. Even the doggies in height order is wonderful. At least you’re looking on the funny side! xx

    • Thanks Veggiemummy, you laugh away, I certainly did! I don’t think those three have ever lined up like that before, usually Buddy is in the middle dominating the space.xxx

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